Yesterday I celebrated the big one. I have learnt a lot of things along the way and will try to cover some of the important lessons that I have not already covered before. 

Dealing with loss.

For years my birthday usually started with a call from Mama- singing one or two of her favourite hymns and then praying for me. She did it like clockwork. I so got used to it and maybe even became complacent. But for the past 7 years, she has not called or texted. Yesterday I felt the emptiness. No one called. The emotions were heavy. Everyone else tried to celebrate with me but I was not in the right place. That's what the loss of a loved one does. You never really get over it, but you just fill the space with other things but now and again the pain just comes back as if she has just passed.

Gratitude-

I am grateful to be here and doing what I do. Many wished to see their 50th birthdays but did not make it. It is not by my own wisdom, but His Grace has kept me.

The essential ingredient for success

I have also learnt that it's not about how one brilliant is. Instead, it's about execution. One may have a brilliant idea yet is weak in execution or worse does nothing about it. I have listened to several brilliant ideas from friends- some of these can change the country's fortunes if not the continent. Our political leaders do the same, they have these grand ideas that are always received with wide applause when they are announced. The day they are announced is most usually the day they die too.

So, you may still ask what is the essential ingredient to success? Implementation of the idea or rather the answer is in the doing. We always joke amongst my Christian friends that it's about what you do on Monday. It's all good to believe. But what are you going to do on Monday?

Break down the idea into bits of actions

What can be done in a month, in a week, in a day and an hour? If everything in the idea depends on others doing things for you- like Daddy will give me money to buy lemons, then Aunty will make the lemonade, then Mummy will take me to the place where I can sell the lemonade. Maybe it's not a good idea. A great idea is when you can see yourself responsible for most of the actions initially- so that all things to be done depend on you. Start working on the idea. Do not be intimidated by the amount of work- focus on one day at a time. Identify and celebrate progress as you get along the idea. You may call these small wins. Learn about how others moved on their ideas. Where possible read lots of autobiographies of people who started something significant. But don't be caught up in reading- push your idea.

Always avoid naysayers

Those who will give you 100 reasons why you cannot succeed. Sadly, the world seems to have more naysayers than optimists. It seems the consensus is always that it cannot be done. Then they tell you about all the bad things mostly to do with government, politics, and the economy. Unfortunately, there is never a perfect condition to start anything according to these naysayers. Just start. Granted you will not succeed at everything but at least you would have given it your best shot.

Yes, you must count the cost and find ways of funding the idea. But that should not stop you from dreaming. I have never started anything with all the answers. You need a healthy dose of faith and optimism.

Know yourself first

Do not be easily distracted by what others are doing. Remember this, we are all uniquely created. Your path cannot be the same as the next person's path. I learnt (maybe a bit late) the importance of knowing myself first. As you grow up you will discover the things that you love and enjoy doing. Dig into those. Find out how you can make a living out of those. For instance, I just discovered that I have green fingers (I love to grow things)- at the moment it's just been a hobby, but I am spending time learning how to monetise the gift.